This one paragraph contains a business writing error. Find and correct it.Year-end accounting review begins November 15. Last year, Sammy Alden looked at our books and came up with some terrific savings, after seeing some waste. Should we book Sammy for another review? (33 words)
Correction:
Year-end accounting review begins November 15. Last year, Sammy Alden scoured our books and discovered some terrific savings, after purging waste. Should we book Sammy for another review? (29 words)
The correction is shorter by 4 words (nearly a 9% reduction), and much more evocative, accurate, and interesting.
Solution:
By far, focusing on strong verb use is the most effective strategy to ensure your business writing is interesting and accurate and concise. Muddled verbs lead to muddled writing.
Underline the verbs in your document. Verify each one conveys action clearly, and connotes meaning on its own, with no need for modifiers. (Slammed the door vs closed the door with force.)
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